Danse Macabre

Clawing at this padded cell
Contemplating suicide
Contemplating homicide

Music- the only thing that heals these wounds
Bloody, oozing and festering
So I sing along to a tune only I can hear
One that all the ‘normals’ fear

While I sing I contemplate suicide
I contemplate homicide
Still trapped in this padded cell
In the halls of my madness
I dance to the ethereal voices only we can hear

Walk with me into the realm of the unreal
Where our insanity makes sense
Can’t you hear the song/music calling?
You’re only a step away

So come with me!
Together we will contemplate suicide
Even as we sit in these padded cells [Let’s sit together in this padded cell.]
We will contemplate homicide



A coiling snake in your chest
Driving you ever closer to your death
Stealing away all of your breath (all that’s left)
The air that’s meant to be mine
All parts of you- delicate and fine

Face your fears
Let them go
Fade away or let everyone know
There is no way to fake your way out of this
Checkmate – the only way out is forward
Your only escape

Everyone is so scared
Of the coming night; the face in the mirror
Of stepping out of this everyday routine
To let their thoughts show (let them all know)
To walk in the sunlight
To make a move

My identity lost forever in a sea of fear
Late at night
When all those unresolved feelings are brought to light
The voices- those that don’t believe in you, come to life

Lost in the face of this everyday routine.
Can’t face my own reflection
Don’t move, don’t react
If you don’t make a move you can’t get hurt

Lovers In The Ground

Six feet under and his heart still beats for her

A pale perfect bride

In a box and she still sighs at the thought of him

Strikingly thin and handsome in his dark suit


The mortician was her confidant,

He fixed her bouquet in her icy hands

Made her feel perfect for her groom,

Their family and friends wept in unison at their eternal union

Love last only as long as death

Forever is only as long as death.

Suicide Song


Suicide smiles

Hide the pain behind the lies

Hide the pain as your heart dies

Hate your life and it’ll be alright

Scream for help as they turn their backs

And you will turn my back on life

And we will turn my back on life

And I will turn my back on life

Somehow I don’t think they would cry at my funeral


Suicide is the background music to my life

An ever constant ringing in my ears

My subconscious claws at my sanity

Conscious mind force feeds me reason

And I’m left wondering how to escape from this war I wage against myself


Mediocrity is a disease.

It makes you cough and then you wheeze

At 1st you burn and then freeze

I think I’ve found a final cure to make us right,

To makes us ‘cool’

It hurts at 1st and then-

Never Again


I’m trying to find my happy place- I think I lost it or maybe I never had it to begin with

Where did all the sunshine and rainbows go?

I’m looking for bunny rabbits, butterflies and cotton candy but instead there’s:

me all alone in the dark.

With that feeling that makes me wanna right a letter

and do that thing that’ll make it all better


The Disappearance

Happy New Year! And Happy 1st Birthday to A Morbid Mind!!!!

This was an assignment for my English class. Enjoy…


Bree glanced at her cell phone as it buzzed from her desk, desperate for attention. She expected it to be a friend asking what to wear to the Halloween party or her date apologising for being late to pick her up, yet again. Shane, her mobile seemed to shout in bold letters, across its screen. What does he want? She thought slightly annoyed. She didn’t give him her number for social calls. He was her lab partner at University and it was irritating that he would call this late. To be honest she found him disturbing most of the time. He was a very intense person always either staring intently at something or someone or writing furiously in an obscure notebook but in class his intensity was useful and most days she got off with doing the least possible amount of work especially when it came to note taking. The

“Hello, Shane?”

“Briana, I’m really sorry to call this late but it’s an emergency.”

A chill went down her spine.

“What’s wrong?” she asked feeling more and more anxious with each passing minute.

“Has your sister come home yet? It’s almost midnight and Tessa still isn’t back.”

She was silent for a long time as a feeling of forgetting something important overcame her.


“Call me Bree! I’ve told you that a million times! Only my annoying parents call me Briana when I’m in trouble.”

She was out breath. Why did she get so mad just now? Her nervousness was getting worse. Wait did he say sister?

“Shane is this a prank? It’s not funny. I don’t have a sister.”

“Bree… I’m coming over, ok?” It wasn’t really a question

“Come on Shane, no!” she cried

He had already hung up. Bree was unsettled by the call so she called her date but the call wouldn’t go through, then she called her friends but all their numbers gave a ‘number busy’ tone. She was about to leave on her own to the party but as she made her way down stairs to the front door, the doorbell rang. She grumbled as she went to open the door. He was really serious, she thought. She flung the door open and shouted:

“Shane if you don’t go home right now I’m calling the cops!”

But it was her date, not Shane and he did not look amused. He was even less amused when Shane showed up that same minute. Shane looked really worried and a little scared so she decided to give him a chance to explain.

“I know this is really weird but please just listen. We both have younger sisters- let me finish” he added when he saw she was going to interrupt. “My sister’s name is Tessa and yours is Alex. Here look at this picture”

Bree felt a sense of Déjà-vu looking at the photo; the girl did look similar to her but that didn’t mean Shane was telling the truth.

“Ok assuming you’re telling the truth, do you know where they went? Which neighbourhood they went trick or treating?”  She asked

“I found this map in my room. Tess had written on it but it’s my dads map so it didn’t disappear. It looks like they were going to the woods to that abandoned house, as a dare. She might have wanted me to follow so she left the map.” He explained.

“I don’t know why I’m doing this but I’ll help you, even though I have no idea what’s going on and don’t even know if you’re Shane. No, I mean sane!” She laughed but he didn’t.

It wasn’t easy to explain to her date why she was driving off with Shane instead of going to the party with him but her intuition told her that she had to do it.

“Why are you the only one that remembers them?”

“I don’t know maybe because I had this picture with me. All the rest of Tess’s belongings are gone”

They drove in silence for a while as she looked at the map; the woods were far from her house. If she had a sister how would they get out to the woods? She asked him. Apparently his sister had her drivers licence and a car. As they drove the clouds seem to move menacingly along with them shrouding the emaciated moon. She placed her hand on the necklace around her neck. She didn’t remember buying it or where she got it. There was a flash of lightning and a deafening rumbled of thunder as a tree on the side of the road in front of them burst into flames as it was struck. She gasped in shock but not because of the lightning. She had just remembered everything.

The moon was a thin fingernail clipping in the cloud heavy sky, as they approached the old, dark house. In the ancient tangled woods, an owl hooted mournfully…

“This is it” Shane said “no turning back now”

She bit her lip nervously but said nothing as they continued towards the dilapidated house. Who would build a house out here; so far from everything and everyone, she thought. The pair had come this far and it seemed they were close to finding their sisters. No matter how scared they were they couldn’t turn back. No one else could do this; no one could help them because no one remembered Alex and Tessa. The house seemed to call out to them with the groans and creaks of its ancient joints.

The door was as ancient as the rest of the house but seemed to have escaped the marks of time. The dark wood was dusty but it seemed to have a slight lustre underneath the grime, which made Bree want to polish the surface until it gleamed. The termites had spared it unlike the rest of the wooden porch which seemed to be held up by will power alone. Intricate carvings framed the door seemed to swirl and coil before their eyes but Shane said it must be a trick of the light…

Her hand rested on the door knob but she hesitated to turn it. Things had been strange so far imagine now that they were at the source; she shuddered at the thought. With a deep breath she turned the tarnished door knob and pushed the heavy door. Surprisingly the large door was lighter than it looked and opened easily, so she stumbled and fell through the door way into the dark inside like Alice tumbling down the rabbit hole. He called out to her but heard no reply. He quickly followed her into the abyss, heart pounding.

The next day at Bree’s house, her father went into her room to call her for breakfast but the room was empty; just nondescript ‘guest’ furniture. Where were his daughter’s possessions: her pink bed (even though she was too old for it); her teddy bears from her childhood; her posters; everything! He quickly ran to Alex’s room and found the same thing had happened. He ran to his wife wide eyed and pulse racing.

“Where are our daughters? Where are all their things?” He cried.

He clutched his chest; not because of his heart but because it was the only material thing that remained of his children: a baby ring that had been Bree’s when she was a toddler and then had been passed on to Alex.

“Honey, calm down. what are you talking about? We don’t have any children.”


Blood Lover


This the 1st poem I posted on this Blog, for some reason I felt like posting it again. I dont think it got much attention back then

Blood Lover

 Bleed for me, my lover

Let me bathe in that delicious warmth

I claw at my thin dark veins

To bring forth crimson velvet

You want to tear, to feed, to let the inner beast take control

(and) I say be free

With me you’ll never have to fear

Feed that insatiable dark desire

Let the beast gorge, consume

Totally devour  me.

The Party Never Stops (Short Story)

This is  new idea that I working on and I still don’t have a very permanent idea of where it’s going.  I hope for feedback and critique and maybe a complement or two. Its going to get creepy is all that I’m going to say an don’ be fooled by the beginning.



Tonight was the night. After a year of exams and application forms and waiting in tense agony, Abigail was finally accepted to her first choice University. She was ready to pursue her academic dreams but before that she had to go to a couple of wicked college parties and forget why she came to college in the first place. It was Fresher’s week and after a day or so of unpacking, signing up for classes and getting her bearing around the new college environment; she was going out with her roommate Sarah to get completely wasted. Sarah was a junior and knew all the inner workings of everything to do with the university, including the party scene. Abby was lucky that they were assigned the same room and had become friends almost effortlessly.

Abby had never been concerned with being cool or popular but it looked like this year she wouldn’t have a choice in the matter as anyone that was friends with Sarah automatically got their names written in everyone’s ‘cool book’. And after only two days the gossip mongers were buzzing with her name. There was nothing Abby could do about it, so she didn’t complain. Maybe it would turn out to be a good thing.

The party was at a freshman’s house. He grew up in town and his siblings had attended the university; so there was another ‘cool pass’ if you ever seen one. His name had slipped Abby’s mind but it was something old fashioned. She assumed he belonged to one of the ‘old money’ families whose ancestors had founded the town and the University. She read about them when she was doing some research on the location online.

Abby had practically been obsessed with the place, it was her Mother’s dream University but she had not been able to attend when her father became ill. She was the only family the old man had, who could care for him. She put her dreams on hold and took night classes at the local college but never forgot her dream and consciously or unconsciously passed it on to her daughter. Abby’s home town was on the other side of the country; she wondered why her mother would stay and nurse Gramps when she was about to leave him for a city that far away.

Abby was hyper with excitement and all that coffee, she could barely stand still as she rummaged through her tiny dorm closet for an outfit. She had no idea what college kids wore on a night out let alone in a rich town like this. It was actually a city but it had retained the old feel of a town as well as a lot of the historical buildings and artefacts. In the end everyone referred to the place as a town.

Finally she settled on a black mini dress (you can’t go wrong with a LBD, right?), knee length boots and a long purple coat over the outfit. She figured, she’d better go basic, less room to make a faux paus. Her wavy, auburn hair was loose in a shoulder length, messy style and her eye lids were heavily covered in smoky grey and black shadow. Her roommate Sarah was a little more daring in her choice of attire she wore a knee length red cocktail dress covered with little faux rubies; high, high stilettos and bright red lipstick that made her full mouth all the more noticeable. Her braided hair was in a high pony tails showing off the high check bones and bright eyes. She carried a short jacket that she wasn’t going to put on; her dress was too great to cover up.


“Ready to go Dorothy?”  Sarah asked

“Born ready, Fairy Godmother! I hope I don’t turn into a pumpkin at midnight.”

“Nah we’ll write our own ends to this story.”

“So do you know the guy who owns the house?” I asked as we got into a cab

“Ive seen him around once or twice. I know his family though, they go to the same church as my family but Sebastian never went with them. His brothers were very popular and with good reason they’re both gorgeous.” We laughed.  Sarah was a big player as far as I’ve seen. She’s always talking about guys.

“I always thought that Sebastian was the introverted type, didn’t expect him to follow in his brothers’ partying ways.” She said still chuckling

“this house its not where they actually live, right?”

“So you’ve heard. I was gonna surprise you with that. It actually the house their ancestors built when they started to make money here. More like a mansion than a house but you know how we all love to play at being simple towns folk here.” She said rolling her eyes

“Why would it be a surprise?”

“You’ll see when we get there.”

Sarah was right it was a mansion. And it was old and seriously creepy. I couldn’t believe they partied here. I half expected the ghost of the original owners to come down the hall berating us and damning us all to hell.  The house was well maintained, restored just like the rest of the town. The chandeliers were polished and shining so were the dark wood floor and furniture. The ballroom was a splice between a rave and colonial glamour. It was strange but it worked. It more than worked; it looked amazing, like going back in time.

The way people were dressed suited the theme of the house: some wore tuxedos and gala gowns just off the runways; others in torn jeans and flannel shirts; goth garb; costumes; modern club-wear and over the top like Sarah in sequins and jewels from head to toe.

There was a DJ but he was in another party room but his mixes were broadcasted to the whole house and the surrounding grounds. People spilled out of every room of the house and were all around, [the house] outside. It was a party without limits or boundaries. I think I even saw a clown somewhere in all the craziness.

Sarah was having a great time showing me around, introducing me to everyone and of course flirting nonstop. It seemed that getting an invite to this event was directly proportional to how good looking you were. It was a little unnerving, beautiful people every where and not just the stereotypical slim, pale beauties but every shape, color and subculture. Pretty goths, skaters, snobs, bookworms and everyone in between. It was like a personal collection of people and again I felt that the whole situation was really creepy but it wasn’t like Sarah was giving me a chance to think about anything other than the task at hand: getting sloshed.  I tried not to drink too much but in the spirit of the party; we were living a night without limits.

I finally got a chance to talk to Sarah alone when were outside for some air.

“Dude! This is crazy” I slurred

“Tell me about it!” she said grinning like a fool

“How come no one knows about this? I mean, in other cities. Hell, other countries! This is… I don’t know! It’s something else. There must be hundreds of people here.” I was just about ranting at this point

Sarah just laughed and shook her head. I heard footsteps behind us and a tall figure stepped from the shadows. Who is that?

“Hi Sarah.” A husky voice says from the shadows

“Hi Sebastian, great party! I thought it wouldn’t happen this year since Liam went away to Graduate school.”

“It’s tradition. Who am I to change that?” he said graciously “Hi, I don’t think we’ve met before” he said looking straight into my eyes in a way that made me uncomfortable.

Our host Sebastian didn’t seem to take after his gorgeous brothers. He wasn’t ugly just very plain: average except for his height, with longish medium brown hair, brown eyes and was neither pale nor tan; neither slim nor muscular.  He just was, nothing more.

I’m Abigail but everyone calls me Abby. This party is amazing, I was just asking Sarah-“

Why no one talks about it or knows about it outside town?


He stepped closer and leaned in.

“Well Abigail, because it’s a secret. Our little secret.”